Nemesis
by ShinigamiStar
Summary: Draco's Musings on his nemesis. Slash [H/D] propositions.


Disclaimer: Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy, Hogwarts, and all other things Harry Potter' do not belong to me. They belong to J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury among others. Only the story is mine, and I am making no profit off of it.

WARNING! This has SLASH themes, and implications. If you don't like the thought or idea of two men falling in love and so forth do not read it! Turn on your heels and run away, because, seriously, no one is forcing you to read it. If you do however have an open mind, go ahead, and enjoy!

This is dedicated to Elise, on of the bestest internet friends anyone could possibly have on her birthday. Thanks for everything: the crazy Iming sessions, dragging me to the H/D thread, and introducing me (in a bizarre fashion) to Placebo. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

NEMESIS

*

Enemy, a word commonly used to describe a rival, a hated person. Someone you are constantly in battle with. Enemy, in my opinion is a bleak, in descriptive word lacking any true passion. For what is an enemy? ****The word is used to classify so many things, people . . . relationships (for lack of a better word) between people, that being someone's enemy is hardly significant, hardly anything special. 

He is my enemy.' Big deal! 

****

He is my worst enemy.' Good for you, buddy, but couldn't you look for a more descriptive term? Worst enemy is an oxymoron, for wouldn't your _worst_ enemy be the one who was the worst at being your enemy? And,as such, be the one that you hated the least? Archenemy is only slightly better;****at least it isn't a contradiction. And yet, if you really hate that person so much that you have that person at the top of your list of enemies, in the Number One spot, couldn't you have come up with a more interesting word? Something less common . . . more unique?

Enemy is not an interesting or unique word. 

Yet, Harry Potter is often called my enemy.

Harry Potter is not my. It is far too complicated between us for us to simply be labeled as enemies.'

When it comes to Potter there is almost a dynamic between us, something so perfectly _right _about it all that I can't seem to find the words to describe it. Isn't my enemy, oh no, rather he's my _nemesis_. The one I cannot best no matter how hard I try. The one so completely opposite from me that it's almost as though what we have, this jumble of emotions, this relationship is meant to be. He's my Gryffindor counterpart: the day to my night, the angel to my devil, the life to my death, the sun to my moon . . . the white to my black. But when we meet it seems as though it all changes. As if the whole world shifts on it's axis, and makes all of the colours break out of the confinements of his white light; colouring us both in brilliant – and they are brilliant – shades of grey. Seems out of place doesn't it? 

And it's true, for when it comes to confronting Potter all I can think of is the blood rushing to my head; the need to beat him in any way possible in insatiable. It's almost as if my whole being is focused on that one moment of confrontation. 

****

When I fight with Potter it's as though I'm finally complete in the most bizarre sense of the word. As though without him my life, my world, would be strangely out of balance. It would be a twisted world of fake colours, twisted bodies. A world with no real point; a world that would be unbelievably wrong. When he is not around it's almost as though I'm halfway to that chaotic world, that place. ****When he is around, or rather when we are talking, fighting, things are righted again – that's what I mean by complete. He turns my world rightways up again.

I don't know what I would do without him – my nemesis in every possible way. It's almost suiting that the word nemesis' comes from the ancient Greek Goddess Nemesis – the Goddess of Divine Retribution; for it seems as though there must be some type of divine intervention in this. Maybe Nemesis does exist, and is trying to pay Potter back for refusing my hand of friendship. ****If that is true this is the best sort of revenge there could possibly be – or maybe my mind is just twisted with how wonderful having him as a rival makes me feel.

I wonder what would have happened if he had accepted my hand of friendship instead of choosing that stupid Weasley over me? Would our friendship be as strong as our rivalry? Would it have lasted as long? Consider the way I feel for him now, I would say that it would be a formidable friendship— or would it be just a friendship?. A far greater bond than he and that pathetic Weasel could ever dream of having. The question is _if_ I could go back to that day and change it all, would I? And the answer is I really don't know. 

****

For the longest time I would have said no, because my pride would have called for it — _me_, befriend, _him_? I _hate_ him — but now I'm not quite so sure; my feelings for him transcend hate. In fact, I don't even know what I feel for him anymore the feelings are so great. 

****

What would it feel like to help him with potions? To fly beside him? To be in the same house as him? Sleep in the same room — bed? — as him? To have him rush up to me after that horrid ferret incident****and comfort me instead of just staring rudely from the sidelines? What would it feel like to be his friend? Would it be worth giving up his rivalry? The thing that, if I really think about it, I hold closest to my heart? Could I do it? That's the question I have to face – Would I give up his rivalry to be his friend?

Ha! It's a silly question though, for he will forever be my nemesis. It is destined to be. I will hate him up front, hate him in the background, and love the — is it a relation ship, or something else? — we have formed forever. Love truly is a fickle thing, for I love his hate, our hate in a way incomparable to most, and that is fine. As long as I have that hate, I will be satisfied. 

And satisfaction really is the key.

*

FIN

Major thanks to Antenora and Eternity for lovely betaing jobs. This thing wouldn't be what it is without you. Also to Rory9 for listening to me read it over the phone, and giving general advice when I was desperate.

Reviews are always welcomed and appreciated for they make the author giggle unbelievably. Thank you for reading.


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